Monday, September 18, 2006

I'm Quitting


Ugh! I can't believe I even just typed that! How can I quit smoking? How can I say goodbye to my lovely cigarette friends?

I just have to. They're expensive. They're not good for me. Not in the casual, "I'm a little out of breath" kind of way I viewed it in my early 20s, but in an ever-more-serious "I have kids and want to be around when they grow up" kind of a way.

It's getting cold outside. Since we don't smoke in the house or around the kids at all, I'm facing another winter of huddling outside in the wind and cold to smoke a cigarette I'm not even enjoying because it's so damn freezing. When you force yourself to keep smoking because damn it, you lit the thing and you're not going to waste it, but you just want to go's time to just let it go.

I've quit before, of course. Six months here and there, ten months with my first pregnancy, almost a year with the second. But I always picked them up again. I missed them. I love smoking. I always have.

But I'm starting to not love it now, and I need to stop it.

I'm not quitting cold turkey, and I'm not wasting money on the patches or anything. (I'll tell a secret: I used the patch to quite twice. Each time I stopped putting the patches on after the first couple of days. My issue is the oral thing, not the nicotine.) Instead I'm cutting way down. I had four cigarettes yesterday. I'm about to go have my second today. I'll have three a day for the next couple of days. By the end of the week I'll be done.



S. W. Vaughn said...

Oh, man...

I should really do this. Really, really. Yesterday I hit a high -- I think I went through more than a full pack. First time I've done that since high school. Seriously.

You're right about the patch. Totally not for people who like smoking.

I'm rooting for you, December. Hey, maybe I can do it if you can do it! :-)

December Quinn said...

You wanna do it with me?

I know what you mean. I was at a half a pack a day or so for over a year-lately the number has started creeping up and up--and Saturday I also had over a pack, same as high school/early 20s.

Why do we love them so much, when they're so terribly bad for us?

Anonymous said...

I'm glad to hear you are trying to quit, December. I lost my father when I was five and my mother about ten years ago. Both were smoking-related cancer. My father was only 40, younger than I am now. I also know a man that is 76 and has been smoking since he was 7 years old. There are many reasons to quit and very few not to. That's my soap box. -JTC

Erik Ivan James said...

The very best reason to quit, December, is for you. Because YOU want to. I quit in 1998 after being a smoker for many years. Like you, I had quit a few times prior. Tried the patch too. I finally succeeded when I decided to quit because I "wanted" to quit, not because I "should", or because of "health", or because of "family". Because I wanted to made it a bit easier. Find other things to help with the oral issues such as toothpicks, gum, licorace sticks, pretzels, etc. Raw carrots worked well for me for some reason.
Good luck, I'll be wishing for your success.

Jenn on the Island said...

Yay December!! You can do it!!

I was only ever a casual smoker, so I can't say I've been there, but I can relate a few things about hubby's experiences (and ramble on on your blog since I don't have one of my own...)

Hubby quit recently. He's wanted to for a while and tried a couple times too. Just having observed the process I can really recommend getting to know your triggers. And then avoiding them like the plague. He avoided beer for 9 months because he knew he couldn't have one without desperately needing a smoke.

One thing he did that totally baffled me was carry around a full unopened pack. It was like a security blanket for him. I thought it was nuts (I couldn't imagine having a chocolate bar in my pocket if I was quitting sugar) but a friend of mine said her aunt has a pack of smokes in her purse from 1987 and hasn't smoked since.

Smoking isn't just an oral thing. When my mom quit she carried around 7 pennies that she would flip and shuffle in the most intricate patterns (yup, OCD runs in the family) just to keep her hands busy.

Drink lots of water to purge those toxins, and give yourself a treat every day for making it through without a ciggy!

You can do it!!

Bernita said...

Erik's right.
You have to WANT to for your own reasons, not because you "should."

December Quinn said...

Thanks everyone! JTC, that's my biggest worry. The thought that I might not be here for my girls and have them thinking, "If only Mom had just quit..." Ugh. Very upsetting.

Good tips, Erik! I was wondering where you were, too, glad to see you again!

December Quinn said...

Ha, that's funny, Jen, because the time I quit for nine months when I wasn't pregnant, I did the same thing. I had a few cigarettes in a drawer. I knew if I ever really, really needed it, I could have it. I ended up not using it, but it was indeed a big psychological boost for me too.

And yeah, I'm sure I'll be taking it real easy on the cocktails and beer for a while. It's too easy to smoke when you're drinking.

I think I'm at the point of "want", Bernita...I guess we'll have to see. It feels like I want to, but we'll see how long it lasts. :-)

S. W. Vaughn said...

They are Satan, filtered and wrapped in paper... or so they say. :-) You can do it!

Yeah, those triggers really get to you. Unfortunately, work is my trigger. Oh -- I'll just stop working! LOL

Sha'el, Princess of Pixies said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
December Quinn said...

It's decemberquinn at gmail, Sha'el--and that's awesome news!! I'll be doing everything I can on this end and sending all the luck to you!

Missie said...

Hey, just wondering if you got the book I recommended on getting your child to sleep through the night, and how it went for you if you did. Hope all is well.
Missie from SnarklingClean

December Quinn said...

Haven't had a chance to grab it yet, Missie, and I was too embarrassed to tell you. (blush).

I totally plan to, though. I have to order it from Amazon (haven't seen it in bookstores here.)

She still sleeping through the night?

Isabella Snow said...

You can do it, December.

I smoked 2 packs a day for 13 years before I quit cold turkey. And its been 5 years now.

For me, the first year was *rough*. I had loads of nightmares about and my oral fixation did not help. I was constantly stuffing my face with food. I think I gained 15 pounds - which was A LOT on my frame, let me tell you.

I was a big fat cow. And I don't say that to worry you - but have a plan of what to do instead of smoke!

Good luck!