Madonna and Guy are divorcing.
It's just so sad. They seemed so perfect for each other; two human beings of great pretention, marginal talent, and superior marketing skills. Two self-absorbed rich people who found each other in a world of self-absorbed rich people. Sigh. It brings a tear to my eye, to think a marriage so clearly based in
strike-while-the-iron-is-hot publicity and the ephemeral promise of a certain lazy one-note filmmaker's lazy one-note films love has come to an end.
No, honestly. I do loathe Madonna, and I do think Guy Richie is a talentless one-note filmmaker who only succeeded on Tarantino's coattails. But they did stick it out well beyond the absolute catastrophe that was Swept Away, so I give them credit for trying.
It does kind of make me wonder, though. Is it really even a marriage when you spend less than half a year together? And how bad do things need to get before you split up a marriage when you only see each other for photo ops? I think even if I were in a bad marriage I'd be able to stay in it for the sake of my kids if I never had to see the man involved for more than ten minutes. Really. Kind of like how for centuries widowhood was one of the best stages in a woman's life*? They could do what they liked, but they weren't sluts because they'd been married; they got to live only and solely for themselves.
I have no desire to be a widow, of course. But I do admit there have been times over the last eight years when I've thought rather enviously of women in polygamous marriages. I know that's not something we're supposed to say, but it's true. Think how nice it would be if, say, you have yet another stupid fucking stomach flu, and there's another wife around to feed and dress the children and take them to school (luckily--or not so luckily--Princess has been sick too, so I haven't had to cart her to and from school, but Faerie still has her nursery school three mornings a week.) Or you had insomnia and didn't sleep, and another wife lets you stay in bed while she handles that stuff.
Or if I have a lot of work to do, I could hand over the dinner responsibilities to another wife while I hole up somewhere with the computer. Another wife can keep the hubs busy (when you've been married for eight years I think expediency can sometimes override jealousy) so I can keep working.
It's not a perfect system, of course (and I don't think I need to tell anyone here how far my tongue is in my cheek.) But seriously, I can't be the only woman in the world who's ever thought this? That it would be quite nice to have a couple of other women around to help with the housework and the kids? To roll eyes with when the hubs is grumpy? Like, I'd tell the hubs to look for a wife who likes doing crafty things with the kids, because I'm not good at that (I have really no visual artistic abilities at all; my stuff looks nice enough but there's no real spark, I can never make it look the way it does in my head). And in exchange I'll teach them all to cook. And there could be an outdoorsy wife, who takes them hiking and to the playground and stuff, while I stay home and smoke and drink bourbon. It sounds frankly ideal, I have to say (and I've only seen Big Love once, sigh; is it even still on? They don't show it here.)
Of course, this assumes I get to be First Wife, as with the feudal Chinese. No Third or Fourth Wife positions for me, no way. I want to be Numero Uno, not the drudge.
But really, am I totally strange in thinking, just occasionally, that this might actually be a really good system? That it might actually save some couples from divorcing, even, if there's less fighting over who clears the table and does the dishes and takes the kids to violin lessons and all that stuff? And everyone gets more sleep.
*Note: When I say this I'm thinking of women throughout history who made loveless marriages simply to be married; I'm not at all implying this was the case for everyone.
In other news: First, I keep forgetting, like a dumbass, to mention this, but did you all see my good friend Caitlin's awesome announcement? I was lucky enough to beta-read the first three chapters of WITCH NUMBERS, and I have to tell you guys, it was fucking awesome. So awesome that this announcement did not surprise me one little bit. You will NOT want to miss these books when they come out, trust me.
Also, Accustomed to his Fangs got its first review! My beloved Mrs. Giggles gave the book an 85:
Accustomed To His Fangs is a most amusing vampire romance with a plot that is different from most of the vampire romances out there...The story here is actually a predictable one, but Ms Quinn manages to make it a most entertaining story nonetheless. Ms Quinn manages to poke a few sly fun at the expense of the more familiar submissive heroines of this kind of stories by having Becky deliberately not wanting to do what those heroines would have done without a second thought...Accustomed To His Fangs on the whole is a cute and most entertaining fresh twist on the whole vampire romance thing.
Read the full review here
Also, we have some new reviews for a couple of older titles! Bitten by Books has been working its way through my entire catalog, it seems, and they have some lovely things to say:
About Blood Will Tell:
...this is a well-written story by Quinn. She definitely knows how to tell a darned good story. 3.5 tombstones from the cranky Southern Belle.
About Day of the Dead:
Day of the Dead is an interesting story, a classic template with a few nice twists and an pleasant ending. Quinn spins a good yarn about vampires, revenge and love.
And last but not least, Personal Demons:
Personal Demons is fast-paced, well written, and downright scary in places. The action doesn’t let up, although it does slow down enough at times so you can catch your breath, and the love scenes between Greyson and Megan are hot enough to steam up your glasses.
So there you go! It's Thursday, and I finally don't feel like I'm going to throw up at any second!